Months after laying her husband Ezekiel Otwoma to rest, TikToker and Influencer Rachel Otwoma is glowing.

While featuring on a recent episode of Obinna’s show, Rachel admitted that she now has time to apply make up and even take care of herself.

When Otwoma was alive, she dedicated all her time into giving him the care he needed as he battled motor neuron disease, hence standing true to the vows she made when their union was solemnised.

Many would now assume that she is relieved after Otwoma’s death but under the glow, is  a grieving and broken soul.

“I am trying so hard to be okay but sometimes being okay is not okay. I take each day as a stepping stone because what I went through was so heavy that it can’t be over immediately. It(life) can’t be easier because this is one person you have been with the whole of your life. You have grown with him. He has left me this gap that is so deep such that it won’t be easy to cover it,” she said.

“For me it is not easy. I can’t be okay because Otwoma is not there. It will take me time to heal. With time I think I will heal, grow, learn, accept and cope with the fact that my husband is no longer existing,” she added.

Another challenge she is facing is lack of a good night sleep because of loneliness. This has forced her to stay awake till late nights and dawn.

“I sleep very late. Tiktokers know that. I am usually live late at night even until dawn everyday because I am looking for company,” she explained.

According to her people don’t understand her and are quick to judge her for being on social media shortly after burying her husband.

“They don’t know that social media helps a lot especially now that I am alone. On TikTok I interact with so many people who give me company. People don’t understand that part but they will judge you seeing you on social media,” she pointed out.

Rachel further said that Otwoma’s death altered her eating habits and she is yet to resume her normal appetite.

“If am a lone, I don’t eat much but when with am friends I eat a lot. When in the house I don’t cook unless am with someone. My eating pattern changed, it is not like before, ” she said.

Otwoma was diagnosed with the motor neuron disease in 2020, which cut short his football career. He passed away in December 2024 during Rachel’s birthday.

In a past interview, Rachel explained  how Otowma’s illness began.

“Otuoma started getting sick like the flu. We gave him homemade concoctions. His voice kept going away, his speech became slurred. A team player suggested we go and have tests carried out. We looked for a neurologist. The tests were carried out and he was diagnosed with Motor neuron disease,” she said.

The two got married in 2015 in a white wedding.

Otwoma played for Kenyan Football teams such as AFC Leopards, Western Stima, Ulinzi Stars, and Muhoroni Youth.